Waiting for Alviti – a one-act play by Tristan Jung

Characters: Alternate Universe Tristan Ruben Former Inside NU EIC Zach Pereles A football. A goalpost Midday. Tristan, sitting on the Lakefill, is trying to get BTN2Go to work on his phone. He taps the phone repeatedly, exasperated, but receives nothing. He gives up, exhausted, rests, tries again. As before. Enter Ruben. Tristan: Nothing to be […]

Northwestern vs. Ohio State, a serious and self-parodically high-brow preview

“Once upon a time you dressed so fine You threw the bums a dime in your prime, didn’t you ? People’d call, say, “Beware doll, you’re bound to fall.” -Bob Dylan,”Like a Rolling Stone”, Highway 61 Revisited  Those branches of the night and day Where the gaudy moon is hung. What’s the meaning of all […]

Northwestern Athletics campaigns…

In honor of the latest goofy, unnecessary and completely less-than-amusing ad campaign proposing Bryant McIntosh to be the face of the dime, because, you know, assists. And while we’re using unpaid athletes’ likenesses to increase sales and market the university, I have some suggestions for Northwestern’s PR department for their next move. If the Shoe […]

If Northwestern had gotten blown out by Iowa…

This is the column I had prepared if Northwestern was blown out by Iowa. That did not happen, but I thought it was still worth reading. Although he saw the vast meadows of the Valley of Mexico stretch into the horizon, he couldn’t feel that the world he inhabited was now younger. Not much younger […]

Northwestern loses to an FCS team; my column

“We’re not actually going to lose, right?” I find it hilarious that the game-winning field goal bounced off the upright. On my minuscule phone screen displaying choppy BTN coverage, I almost tricked myself into believing that the ball had bounced back into play. For a split second, due to the perspective of the camera, it […]